First was someone tying me up and I didn’t like it as much as I thought, which made me think for years that fantasy was better left in fantasy. Regular sex works for me, I’ve been lucky in the libido and response department.
Many years later got to play different ways, and a lot of it really was so good in real life. Still not really into the macrame rope stuff but having someone get so turned on when I have a natural response to them taking control is one of the absolute hottest things - that feedback loop. And I found some pain really does add to pleasure for me, not a lot (there’s a point where it’s a turn off) but again if the guy like, hits me and gets hard oh my God I have the uncomfortable strong desire it bothers me but I treasure that response regardless because it’s one of the things I thought wouldn’t work in real life and it does.
First was someone tying me up and I didn’t like it as much as I thought, which made me think for years that fantasy was better left in fantasy. Regular sex works for me, I’ve been lucky in the libido and response department.
Many years later got to play different ways, and a lot of it really was so good in real life. Still not really into the macrame rope stuff but having someone get so turned on when I have a natural response to them taking control is one of the absolute hottest things - that feedback loop. And I found some pain really does add to pleasure for me, not a lot (there’s a point where it’s a turn off) but again if the guy like, hits me and gets hard oh my God I have the uncomfortable strong desire it bothers me but I treasure that response regardless because it’s one of the things I thought wouldn’t work in real life and it does.
It really is all about that loop. It feels somewhat Zen to me – something about the sound of one hand clapping.