The Denephew joke remains one of my all time favourites, and it was a footnote to a footnote.

absolutewin.gif

The symbol you used, “•” U+2022 is the bullet, but what if the packaging is actually using “·” U+2027, the interpunct, which would suggest the product is actually called “poptarts” not “pop-tarts”. Or it might be “·” U+22C5, multiplication, meaning we could simplify the product name to “2(pt)oars”.

Two part oars.

You don’t rotate the handle in sync with the precession of the vernal equinox? Your cast iron’s going to be fucked when the age of Aquarius begins. I’ll bet the Priestmunty who proclaimed your pans wasn’t even a bake-borne by the eight transcendental Broilers of Avalon. Poser.

Dreams.

When you’re in balls-deep and give one final buck, spraying your thick batter deep into him, and you feel his legs tighten around your waist and his fingers dog into your back as he erupts into the paper-thin gap between your stomachs as as your tongue fights his and his fights yours, and you pull away with your lips still bridged by saliva and sweat and you stare at his face framed by your hands and you caress his chin with your thumb and realise he’s the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen and you stare into his big, deep eyes and he stares back into yours he whispers “I love you” and you whisper back “I love you too” I cannot even begin to stress how important it is to say “no homo” otherwise you might give off the wrong signals.

Also these divide into nine buckets (or 16, 25, etc). They might not been the sharpest spoon in the shed.

Why is your nose ear (or vice-versa)?

Probably,

Checks out.

Years ago me and a couple of mates built mini shallow-level submarines. Initially they were remote controlled, then programmable (since radio waves don’t like water) and eventually we got to the point where they could travel a few miles at a time underwater, surface enough to expose their GPS antennae to confirm a fix and link to Meshtastic for updated instructions, and then carry on their way. My point is these smugglers need to get their shit together. “Mother ships”? Give me a break. Amateurs.

Havelock Vetinari, is that you?

Given the bullshit they deal with - especially in ass-backwards Reform towns - and the effective pay freeze they were under during the last government, I think this is good but not nearly enough. And before anyone chimes in, yes, this also applies to public sector workers in healthcare, sanitation, education, emergency aid, etc, etc.

“I peep object is for contents of object of equal or smaller or slightly bigger. Am as such. Thus, I can and will and must be contain in containering object. Ergo. Am.” - Cat, probably

I have no idea how good this advice is, but I’d upvote just for the username and use of non-ASCII characters.

It’s a bullshit argument and this article is a classic example of a shitty journalist pretending that a new law overrules every other law in existence.

And here’s your daily reminder that the OSA was introduced, championed and passed by the Tories in 2023 despite outcry. Sunak even said at the time it was a problem for the “next Parliament” to deal with. Now they’re trying to blame Labour.

That’s actually how it works: appliance’s plugs have a fuse for the appliance so each device gets a sensible level of protection. The outlets don’t have fuses, but the circuit does.

I’ve always been of the opinion that type G’s biggest problem was how painful it is to step on and that the switch is pointless (as per my earlier comment)… the fact that those two cancel each other out is actually a bit of a revelation.

I don’t have one, but I commend them on commissioning the best commercials of all time:

https://youtu.be/kaRUhhhXwuw