As a bi trans woman, I’ve definitely noticed similar trends between straight guys and lesbian women. And for anybody wondering, in my experience, lesbian trans women are equally as abusive as cis lesbian women, and straight trans men equally as predatory as cis straight men.

I do this too but I only send them to justify having taken them lol.

It was pointed out to me somewhere else that it probably isn’t the actual word being censored, but rather anything the AI they use to moderate deems as probably being intentionally controversial. The word “cis” does now show up, in one comment, and the word “cisgender” in another, both made several days after I pointed out the issue.
For reference, and why I think the “AI removing controversial comments” is a plausible theory, the comment I replied to was “sorry, I had to use the bathroom,” which I replied to with

“In the bathroom Matching your birth sex I hope 😤
Unless your chromosomes are xx, then you better use the women’s room.
Unless you also have a beard, then you better be using the men’s room.
Unless you’re also a cis woman, then you better use the women’s room.
Unless you’re also tall, then you better use the men’s room.
Unless you’re also intersex, then you better not use either or we might have to acknowledge you exist.”

And then after that all the comments of mine that got removed were pointing out that the reply had been shadow banned (editing to note: I did also try reposting the original comment worded differently and it still got shadow banned,) which also got shadow banned, until I switched to calling it “darkness forbidden,” where it went through. However, others were able to use the phrase “shadow banned” with no problem when replying to me.

The last time I turned off XP was a few months ago when I replaced it with Linux Mint on a PC I use to play old games in my room (because I wanted to play old MMOs and that required internet access, which XP would not have been safe for.)

I’m pretty sure I’ve only ever once used the word cis on any other occasion, but I can’t even find the video it was a comment on anymore to check if my comment is still there. It was a short about trying to explain to cis people why cis wasn’t a slur. I don’t know if I’m blind or it’s genuinely gone.
You might be right though. Albeit I’d find it odd for the Onion to be blocking trans related words in a video explicitly about trans people, but it could explain why my first comment was up for 10 minutes or so before vanishing. But the first time it wasn’t shadow banned, it was completely gone, even on my end, so I suspect it was manually removed.

I suspected this probably wasn’t the first time. Definitely frustrating. I wish there was some other video sharing site that offered what YouTube did without the evil part.

Fatal familial insomnia keeps me up at night.

I can relate in several ways. One day I woke up to my step mom screaming and my dad screaming at her and the sound of things being thrown around. He was super drunk, and when he came out of his room, I pulled a knife on him, but he was too out of it to notice. That or he had and just never told me. Before I got it in me to move, he started crying, hugged me, and kept repeating “I’ll get better” over and over again. After that day he started going to regular therapy. Religious therapy, not real therapy, but it never happened again, so I guess it worked either way. Nonetheless I can’t bring myself to ever step foot in his house again. I’ve talked to him over messaging before during some emergency situations where I had nobody else I could call. He seems like he’s really improved. But tbh, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to fully trust that he’s genuinely changed. Because of him my stomach still drops whenever I hear sudden loud noises, even if it’s just somebody dropping a screwdriver or something.

I’m in neither camp personally. I overheard my dad joke to my mom about how the best time to stop beating your kids is when they’re old enough to fight back, and so I learned to fight against it, physically. Of course he didn’t stop at first, I was small and weak, until one day soon after I cut his eye with my fingernail. That’s when he finally decided to tone it down.
And yet when that happened, I wasn’t happy. I thought I was a monster for putting him in the hospital.

NH is the weirdest, most inconsistent state in New England policy and law wise. Transgender rights are especially bizarre. They tried to ban us from bathrooms a few times and yet their transgender medicaid policies are some of the best in the country, covering electrolysis, which is fairly rare in the US, and even covers some cosmetic procedures like breast augmentation.
Vermont is weird similarly, having a significant amount of republicans and yet being one of the most progressive states in the country. New England states feel like they’re having a perpetual identity crisis politics wise.

I’ve been on ADHD meds twice before now and I can confirm that the euphoria, “everything is amazing” feeling wears off after the first week or so, but the ability to relax and focus never go away, and that’s what I was referring to.

lol, I suppose that is true.

Huh, I guess it is more common than I thought. I wonder how I ended up coincidentally only buying cases with it at the top if they’re so uncommon.

My desktop has it at the top, as did the PC I had before it a few years ago. I’ve seen PCs with it at the bottom, but I’ve never owned one, so hearing that they’re always at the bottom is weird to me.

Happy to see things moving to a safer place. Already subscribed 😀

Yeah, I suppose that does sound nice. I guess I’ve just got some degree of learned helplessness making me feel like there’s no escape.
A whitelisted Lemmy server sounds like it’d be great. Still get the feel of Lemmy minus (most of) the misogyny.

In my experience, unfortnuately, it doesn’t matter where you go or how much effort they’ll have to put in, some dude is always going to take personal offense to any space he’s not allowed in and kick up shit there about it.

I would just delete my Lemmy account entirely if I weren’t disabled and barely able to leave the house. There basically aren’t any non misogynistic places for me to hang out.
As tough a job as it’s gotta be to moderate this community, I’m glad this space exists so I have somewhere I feel at least semi safe to be.
Also, blocking every popular instance except blahaj drastically cuts down on the misogyny you encounter, especially if you use an app like connect which let’s you block every user of an instance as well as the content of it (as opposed to lemmy’s built in blocking which only blocks the content and not the users.)

I got accused of that once for simply saying I didn’t feel welcome on Lemmy as a woman.

Actually, that’s putting it lightly. What they said was a multi paragraph tirade attempting to trigger every trauma I had or might have explicitly because they thought “unwelcome” was still too welcome and, again explicitly stated by them, they thought women should suffer.

To be fair, they were downvoted to hell then banned for what they said, but in the same thread somebody accused me of being too extreme because I said I support job fairs for women, and they were very much the opposite of downvoted.

It seems to mostly be isolated to online spaces though. I bring up these “extremist” feminist topics IRL and people act like it was so obvious I didn’t even need to say it, even men.

Speaking as a trans woman: This meme in particular? Just seems like lighthearted fun, using a joke to praise somebody for being a good person.
But sometimes people take it too far, and the limit for me is when it’s treated like there are zero exceptions, all men are bad.
I didn’t draw that line arbitrarily. I have lived experience that shows the “all men are trash” crowd are far less likely to treat me as a woman, and more likely to view me as a now vulnerable man who they have an opportunity to take revenge on. Things like laughing at me for having problems they’d be supporting other women for. My mom used to have a friend like that, who laughed and gave me the classic “welcome to being a woman” every time I brought up things like not being able to go home for a while one day because a car tried to follow me there, or when disruptions in my hormone treatment lead to pain and emotional instability.